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Wednesday, July 28, 2021

    Dear Miss Pearl: A Stinky Situation

    Dear Miss Pearl
    Miss Pearl, a well-loved member of the Muscatine Community, has many years of experience helping others through challenging times. She looks forward to helping you solve all of life's problems, large and small.

    Muscatine Living

    Dear Miss Pearl,

    I’ve been married to a wonderful man for almost forty years. Thirty-six of those were extremely happy, but the last four have been miserable. I feel like I’ve been deceived…my sweet, loving, proper husband, who wouldn’t say a word about flatulence, has now become a human gas machine, complete with sound effects. He can be sound asleep even and it smells so bad it wakes me up. Sometimes when he gets out of a chair, I can hear him tooting clear in the next room. He refuses to discuss this and acts like he is almost proud of it. Do you think I have a right to be mad?


    Gasping for Air

    Dear GFA,

    Well that just stinks!!! They have some over-the-counter medications for that or maybe try to pinpoint a specific food that is causing it. I mean I’m not saying you shouldn’t be mad, but you could start a local chapter of Gastric Disturbances Anonymous and at least have some people to sound off to before your happy household explodes!

    Sending good ‘Scents’ your way,

    Miss Pearl

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