Dear Miss Pearl: Noisome Nose Nuisances
by Dear Miss Pearl
August 16, 2019

Dear Miss Pearl,
I have been dating an amazing guy for eight months, and I just started hanging out with his son. They have been to my place for dinner a couple of times, and I have to be on constant booger patrol! Yep, you read that right, nasty juicy boogers under my table, on the arm of my couch, on a wall, and the list goes on! I am by no means a clean freak, but I definitely don’t want an eight year old’s boogers on my stuff. I tried offering him a Kleenex. I’ve tried telling my boyfriend, but he just laughs it off and acts like it’s not a big deal. I don’t want this kid to hate me, but I don’t want boogers everywhere either. Am I being a prude? I don’t have kids of my own. Is it normal for kids to have so many boogers!
Sincerely,
Booger patrol


Dear BP,
I honestly don’t know what you could do or say any better than what you’ve already done. Handing someone a tissue is the most subtle and polite way to handle this “sticky” situation. You might suggest that it could be a medical problem because his snot is never ending, or you may just have to “blow” up at both of them if he keeps brushing you off. Without sounding too “snotty” tell them you’re going to have to “pick” a new boyfriend if you find another booger on your stuff when they leave!
Good luck,
Miss Pearl

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