I was listening to the radio today and there was a program on National Public Radio about self-care that caught my attention. There were a number of points that had me thinking about that phrase self-care. These things have changed how I think about self-care. Civil rights activist, womanist, and poet Audre Lorde is credited with the notion of self-care. She wrote, “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation. . .” As we have just begun a new year, I thought maybe as we take on those resolutions, one might be about self-care.

For me, when I think about self-care, I often think about something like a spa day, you know a way to treat myself. The commentators noted that retailers have capitalized on this thought of treating ourselves, and so they have marketed their goods as self-care. Think about the advertisements on television and social media. There are ads from everything to the latest fitness trend and best supplements to the best podcasts on how to improve our lives. We are bombarded with the message that self-care is treating yourself.

Here’s the problem. Not everyone can afford to treat themselves in that way. Not everyone has the time it takes for self-care in this way. Maybe most importantly is the underlying question, is self-care about treating yourself or is it something more, something deeper? This is not an essay on how one should not treat oneself to a pedicure, or massage, or gym membership. It is an invitation to think in a more expansive way about self-care – a way that truly benefits you and your life.

Self-care could be about a new morning ritual. Self-care could be about making a doctor appointment that you have been putting off. Self-care could be about taking a few minutes each day to be still. Self-care could be about eating healthy. Self-care could be about getting together with friends, or putting yourself out there to make new ones. Self-care could mean that you ask for help with something. Self-care doesn’t have to cost any money and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Most importantly it is realizing that what you need is not only important, but it is essential. In my religious tradition, we believe every human being is a child of God and that we are worthy of love. We are created uniquely and each of us has much to give to this world, and we are also created to rest. May your 2023 be one where self-care is an act of love.