I have mentioned “the great resignation” in previous articles. We are in the middle of a huge social upheaval. Turnover at many organizations is trending significantly higher for many reasons. One of those reasons is because individuals are seeking meaningful work. A second reason is because individuals wish to work remotely more than in the past. Money, and the rate of pay is a third reason.
I have an acquaintance who is looking for work. They have taken a number of interviews with the same company. (Not a Muscatine based employer.) Interviews have been with human resources, the hiring manager, and with working peers.
They have been ghosted. So, what is ghosting? Ghosting is, “the practice of someone suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.” This employer simply has not responded to the thank you emails after the most recent interview.
I have to admit when I heard this about my acquaintance, I was quite surprised. Employers these days seem to be begging for employees to work for them. This just doesn’t make sense to me, though, ghosting seems quite prevalent.
Ghosting even happens here in Muscatine! When I think back, I have submitted resumes in the past to an employer – and never heard back. I have even been ghosted by two employers here in Muscatine – one for a job application, and one for a quote on a project.
Continuing that thought, I called a service provider here in town, twice now, and they told me they would “call me back next week,” and twice, they never did. I don’t get it. Should I expect more from an employer? Am I wrong about that?
As I am feeling frustrated, I begin to listen to one of my podcasts from Tim Ferris that features Diana Chapman. Diana talks about something called the “Drama Triangle.” What in the world is the Drama Triangle? The Drama Triangle was first described by Dr. Stephen Karpman, it identifies three predictable roles (victim, rescuer, persecutor) that people in problem situations find themselves.
Karpman believes that “such dramas are so common in our society. . .Without realizing it, a particular role, can become a comfortable life habit.”
When I researched the Drama Triangle, one section was devoted to ‘Getting off the Triangle.’ Fascinating Reading!
The internet site gave me insight to what action I could/should take in addressing these issues. I am now in the process of solving my issues. I am learning and developing a skill at the same time. When I have a question, I make sure my action is not in a vacuum (alone). Interesting to note that there are people that have the same challenges you have. This is the foundation of self-help groups. My actions address the issues I have. When ghosted – I understand and have my plan.
So what could your plan be?
- Move on completely.
- Stay focused on your goals without the “ghoster”
- Leave the ghoster to deal with their lack of courage
